"Oops, I did it again."

I really need to work on my Patience Portfolio. Just what is a Patience Portfolio, you might ask? Well, a Patience Portfolio is what I call my stockpile of "wait-awhile-before-you-spout-off answers".
For instance, my number one question EVERY day is, "Is the mail in, yet?" This question is first asked around 8:05 a.m. I clock in at 8:00 a.m., so I am tempted to reply, "Lady/sir, how would I know? I haven't had time to read the sign posted, on YOUR mail room door. I just got here!" Or, my other answer could be, "The mail never comes before 10:00 a.m. Have you looked at the clock?"
But, most of the time, I just reach into my Patience Portfolio and calmly reply, " No. It isn't here, yet."
My Patience Portfolio also contains other stock answers like, "Let's look at the Activity Sheet, for the Bingo Time", or "Yes, we do have several Public Restrooms, and they are located....." What I really want to say, "Have you consulted the Activity Sheet, which lists daily times, whereabouts and costs, for every single activity for every day of the week, every week, and has done so for the past five years???!", or "No, this is a private residence and we don't allow anyone to go to the bathroom here. We require the public to either hold it, or go back home to their own bathroom."
My Patience Portfolio is large and I use it daily, but it still needs work. Occasionally, I let slip with a few moderately snide remarks. When a lady comes up to my desk, in the dead of winter, dressed in a thin sleeveless top, and dares to complain that she is cold, I have been known to suggest that she return to her 85 degree apartment or put on a sweater when she comes to the lobby. Rude, I know, and I really do try to apologize for the slip, afterward.
So, allow me to beg for forgiveness in advance. Sometimes the impatience just falls out of my mouth, and in spite of my Patience Portfolio, I am powerless to stop it!

Lord. Please help me to watch my mouth. Lead me to use kindness and care in my speech. Remind me that patience is a virtue.