What on earth?????

 Just when you think you have seen it all, something happens that puts you down a peg or two, on your experience "road of life." You know, the type of event that completely gob smacks you, and you are totally dumbfounded. 

I don't want to brag, but recently, I have complemented myself on a distinguished group of friends that, for the most part, exhibit what I consider to be the best of mature couth and manners. My friends, new and old, can behave themselves in almost any circumstance. Big events, small events, lunches for a hundred or dinner for two, I'm proud to be with them. 

However, what is it that we say about proud? Yesterday, while supervising a coffee/donut event for a small gathering of ladies, I proceeded to see a well-dressed matron, stick a fork, in each of nearly three dozen donuts. May I help you, I asked? She replied that she was looking for a raised one. After I shut my gaping mouth, I told her that they were all cake donuts. So, disappointed for sure, she picked out one and went on her merry way.

Who does that? I mean really! If she had been a three year old, I would have smacked her hand and yanked the fork out of her paw. Didn't we just spent the greater part of the last to years, avoiding contact with EVERYONE. What was she thinking? Oh My Goodness.

Dear Lord. Give me patience....but, could you please work on good sense for everyone. 

Joy to the World

 One of the most annoying facts about aging, is downsizing. We all have to do it. The stuff that we spend a lifetime collecting, can't be taken with us, to our final destination, so we all need to let a bunch of it go. 

The first thing that I chucked this week was the stack of papers, downloads from my computer and several books, about decluttering. One author wrote, " Get rid of everything that does not give you JOY". I tried that for a while, but honestly, some mornings my only JOY items, would be a full coffee mug, my ratty KU sweatshirt and paint-spattered jeans! 

Oh, and I have tried the "If you didn't wear it last season, it needs to go to the thrift store" theory. Sincerely, I have one, less than six-foot long closet, for my clothes, I don't think that's excessive. The nearest thrift store, knows me by name! And, For years, I have subscribed to the adage, "Nothing comes into the house, unless something else goes out." However, I have recently altered that to, "One thing in...10 things out."

There has been one helpful suggestion, that I recently saw on the Internet. Downsize by not buying any new holiday decorations. In my case, Christmas is not an issue. It's those pesky, cute pumpkins that are on shelves everywhere. 

So, I have sworn an oath to myself. No more pumpkins. "Nancy", I told myself, "do not buy any more ceramic, wood, papier mache, or real pumpkins. Don't carve any fresh pumpkins, and stop creating any more crocheted pumpkins. You have enough! And, furthermore, start gifting them to your friends and neighbors. Give them a little of your JOY"!

All knowing God. Joy does come from giving to others. Show us how to deal with our selfishness. Help us to be more giving.

Tis the Season to be Spicey

Happy Pumpkin Spice Season. I used to think of Autumn, as the season of Halloween and Thanksgiving, but folks, the world is changing my thoughts. Everything imaginable, now comes  Pumpkin Spice flavored. The obvious being coffee, tea, donuts, ice cream and cake mix. But, there are some odd newcomers on the shelves that might or might not surprise you.

There are Pumpkin Spice Cheerios and Pumpkin Spice Granola Bars. How about some tasty Pumpkin Spice pancakes? Or, Pumpkin Spice Oreos (Oreos with bright orange filling)?And, you can wash your hair in PS Shampoo, use a PS Moisturizing Face Mask or daub on PS lipstick. There are even Pumpkin Spice dog treats! 

Just what is Pumpkin Spice? It is actually a mixture of ground Cinnamon, Nutmeg, Ginger, Allspice and sometimes Clove. That simple spice mixture (if you cook, you will have all, or most of them, in your spice rack) is the flavor combination used in pumpkin pie and pumpkin bread. It's the perfect spice mix to cover up the horrible taste of pumpkin. It also works wonders with zucchini, which is another nasty tasting vegetable.

Some crafty ad executive just tacked on the word "pumpkin" to spice up (get it) a new twist on the season. Just like there is no crying in baseball, there is no pumpkin in Pumpkin Spice.  

But, go ahead. Drink up. That Pumpkin Spice Latte won't be around, forever.

Great God. Aren't we just the funniest creatures you created? Keep us safe from our silliness. We are so thankful for our many blessings. 

 

Conversation and Controversy

 I've started, edited, restarted and deleted several posts this week. Just when I think that I have something outstanding and earthshaking about which to write, upon reading, my words just seem inane and fairly divisive. I guess a better word might be, MEAN.

My opinions, are just that. Opinions. We all have opinions. But, the problem with opinions, is often, how we share them. How many times have we begun, a conversation, by saying, "Of course.." or "You can't be foolish enough to believe.."? Isn't that the same as saying, "I'm right and you are wrong." And, what's more, "Because you don't believe what I believe, you're just stupid!" No wonder this country is on fire!

Remember when people could have civil discussions? Conversations were had, without hate and vitriol.  What ever happened to "you vote for your candidate and I'll vote for mine"? Honestly, sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. Why do we continue to make the process so hurtful? 

Why can't we all just get along? 

From now on, I intend to stick to the facts.  The wise policeman, Joe Friday, cautioned us all....."The facts ma'am. Just the facts". Oh yeah, I'll continue to offer my opinions, but those opinions are going to be tempered by first checking to see, that I am not personally attacking anyone, in the process.  

Dear God. Your children are so very foolish. Why do we try to force our opinions and or beliefs on our fellow travelers? Keep us on the straight and narrow, as we aim for the prize.

Do You Hear What I Hear, II?

I have been told, more than a few times, that I have a song for everything. Astonished people remark about this, because I have been known to burst into song, for any reason. My songs are usually one or two stanzas of musical nonsense, that just happen to pop into my head and my mouth, simultaneously. I belt them out, usually to an stunned audience, of two or three. And, after their mouths close, we continue our conversation, moving back to whatever we were doing, previous to my outburst.

Take for instance, the state of Montana. Whenever, I meet someone from Montana, I sing, "My Home's in Montana, I wear a bandana....". Or, sometimes it's, "There once was a Lady named Hannah, who was in a flood in Montana."  Or, just yesterday my daughter went to a Paw Paw Festival. I just could not get the words and tune to "Way Down in the Paw Paw Patch", out of my mind.

Now, if you are having trouble, picturing this phenomena, recall the comic George Burns. My, on the spur of the moment performances, are just like his, about as musical, but without the cigar! 

Being a Kansan, by birth, I have a repertoire of 9 or 10 Kansas songs, in my musical memory bank. Missouri...a couple. Hats...several on that subject. Cats.....sure. Spiders...yes. You get the picture.

Singing makes me happy and recalling those little ditties, keeps my mind working. Life is spectacular, if you are a little bit quirky. I know!

Dear God, joy is a blessing. Keep us mindful of the joys in our life and help us spread that joy to others.

REALITY CHECK

 Had any photos taken lately? As I approach, yet another birthday, I find that I am startled by the sudden appearance of a little old grey-haired lady, in all of my recent photos. Frankly, I know it's me, but how did I get this way? I certainly don't feel like an old person, but by golly I must be.

Renewing my Driver's License, required a photo. I've never had a decent photo taken at the DMV, so that one didn't bother me. Deranged and disheveled are what the clerks are aiming for, at that particular agency.

However, the recent Passport Photo, I had taken, was another matter. "Don't smile, or show any teeth", she said. "Take off your glasses and look straight at me." Okay, I followed the instructions, paid for the two photos, and OMGoodness, the worst possible results. That photo won't do much, in identifying me. I wear glasses. I smile. I have teeth! Well, that crabby, unhappy likeness is not the real me.

I believe, that old doesn't just mean how you look, appearance wise. Mostly, I think, it's how one feels inside, that ages a person. I'm healthy and have more blessings than I can count. I try to look forward, not backward. I am enjoying life. It's a new adventure every day.

Dear Lord, thank you for our many blessings. Every morning, you give us the opportunity to improve our lives and the lives of others. Life is good.

 

I've Been Everywhere Man....

 Well, not exactly. Recently, however, I did have an extended visit, with relatives, out West. I loved everything about my trip.  My goal, for my remaining years, is to make the most of any experience and try to make every day an adventure. 

The first adventure, is travel itself. Employees of the airline, on which I chose to travel, all seemed to think that every passenger is an experienced traveler. However, they are wrong! I can't be the only person in this wide world who hasn't been anywhere, but locally, for the last 2 and a half years! We oldies have forgotten a lot of our travel savvy. Sorry folks, some of us need specific instructions, not just "get in line lady." (There were three lines.) Upon discovering which queue was the right one, a surly young person inquired abruptly, "Where's the metal in your body?" I replied that I didn't have any. To which he barked, " Well, you're in the 70 years and older line, you have to have metal...pacemaker? knee?..." I replied that I indeed had no metal. He, with a disbelieving scowl, waved me on.

My first experience with air travel, was in 1954, when I boarded an Ozark Airlines, DC-3, flying first to Wichita and then on to Los Angeles. I wore a brown and white checked suit, and a hat. My patent leather Mary Janes and tiny purse, were brand new. As I bucked my seatbelt, on the return trip, this week, I noticed that my seatmate, to the left, had more holes in her jeans than denim. OMGolly, times have changed.

Ending on a very positive note, due to my hearing loss, I had checked the impairment box choice, "deaf", on my on-line ticket. Because, I was truly concerned, that I would not hear my boarding number being called. Voila! Deafness allows a passenger to Pre Board. Just call me "First On/First Off Nancy"!

Dear Lord. Thank you for keeping me moving and enjoying life. We all have our good days and not so good days, but we are truly thankful for the days we have. We are blessed.